Story from the Heart

My Favorite Song

If you asking to someone about their favorite song, they often choose based on their condition. Such as when someone falls in love, he maybe like to hear or sing a happy love song. When someone broke up his love, he maybe chooses a sad love song. Well, many people do it, included me. I’m in a bad condition now, the most bad that I ever passed. All is as like as what Last Child tells to us in their song, “Dendam”.

In relation with it, I’ll say at the first that I’m one of the Friendship Lovers. I always have one or more than one best friend in my everyday. The changes of life makes me parted with one of my best friend, and get one again in my new day. Sometimes I get the better one, at another time I get the worse one, and I just get the best one.

He is a boy. I don’t think to tell you his true name, but we can call him “Mr. R”. I knew him on November, 2011. He is the grandchild of the previously owner of my home. Well, this is the rule: you can not stay too long at the house that not yours again. The grandfather of Mr. R not gets the new home yet, so they rent the part of this house for a year, and become my neighbor. Mr. R is the most diligent of all his grandchild, so he often comes to here, helps his grandfather. We never talk too much until the end of November, 2011. I still remember it, the unforgettable thing in my life. His brothers knocked my home’s door an evening, met and asked me to borrow them my English dictionary. I borrowed them three English dictionaries that I had. Then, I saw their expression at that time, it is made me smiled and helped them. We did his English homework together. What a strange thing that moment was! We were looked like an old friend, naturally, and no one be shy.

On October 1st, we officially our friendship. Mr. R was not only my best friend, I said he was my everything. I supposed him as my brother, my dad, my diary, my guardian, my teacher, and much more. He was like my own family for me, and indeed, my mom supposed him as her own son. We were so kind for each other. I gave everything he need, standing right next to him in all time. He was there, when I had problem with someone, never bore to hear all my complains about life, told me his advices, answered my questions, wiped away my tears, protected me, carried me, made me laugh, took me away from the sadness, brought the happiness inside to my life, made a rainbow in my sky. Our friends and family often asked for many times, am I his girlfriend? Or is Mr. R my boyfriend? Then we will laugh and answer “we are best friend forever”.

All has been changed in the new year 2012. Mr. R was not like the same person that I ever knew. He was so different, and become more different. I don’t know what’s going on with him. He had no time to me again, indeed, no time to reply my SMS. The top of that, he fled the house, without notice. He lied his Mom, lied me, lied anyone who care with him, leaved us. Now,  I know from his Mom, why he fled the house. Only for his friend. His friend influenced him so he want not to school again, and filled his mind with thinking about work, search for money. Oh my God! Mr. R is too young for it! He took the wrong decision, hurt everyone’s hurt who carried him.

I cried for him until midnight, and still cried for him every time I remember him. All in here reminds me of him. I feel missing, lost, lonely, angry, confused, disappointed, so poor, and other feeling like that. Mr. R is a part of me, and now I miss it. I know it will happen, but I never think all will be so fast. Sometimes I think that I am egoist. Maybe this is the best for him and I ought to pray for him. But some part of my heart can not forgive him, a boy who leaves me alone without notice, and make me feel that I never be a important person for him.

However, the most painful is when your heart be hurt by someone who always make you happy. Their kindness makes you sure, and then you will believe that they will never make you sad. So if they make you hurt, broke your heart and destroy your belief, it is an indescribable pain.

            That’s all my story that same enough with what telling by song “Dendam”.

--- Actually, I write this story just to improve my English :) but, I can't say "no" if someone ask me : "Is it a true story?"